Thursday, August 20, 2009

I love marriage.

So I got married in May, right. And the man I married, Bryan is the most amazing person. He is perfect for me. he pushes me to be a better person, and to get things done even when I feel like giving up. He loves me so much, and to be honest, I have complete trust in him and the fact that he will never leave voluntarily, he's around for good. I'm so blessed to have him in my life.

BUT... be aware people, when you get married things change and they change fast. I have so many extremely supportive friend who loves Bryan and are so happy for both of us. But when you are married, I think that people start thinking you no longer have much time to do anything else except be with your spouse. And yes, Bryan is my favorite person in the world and the person I want to be with the most, but i want to see other people and hang out with them. Now I'm not saying that all my friends have forgotten me, they haven't, but life is different now, things are definitely harder now. I'm learner to live life without a lot of people around me at all times like I had for the last five years at MACU... It's weird not having that and I love my quiet, but I do miss people being there to hang out with or to talk to.

I have listened and taken mental notes from so many speakers on marriage and how to keep it healthy. One big thing that I really want is to have a girl-friend that I can talk with, now that doesn't mean it's someone I can talk bad about Bryan to, no way, but a person whom I can vent with or just hang out with so I have another person who helps me grow as a follower of Christ, and I can help her as well. They always say it's good to have friends outside of just your spouse. I crave that. It's my blog, i'll be honest. I'm ready to move. I will miss Bryan's family especially his mom, who has shown me so much love, and I will miss other people. But I'm ready to be in a new state, with different things to do and makes new friends as a couple with Bryan. Also people who don't know the old me unless I want to let them know that shy girl and all the mistakes I made.

I'm ready for a start in a new place, just Bryan and I and I'm ready to let go of people in my life that I have come to realize that I depended on a whole lot and now that I'm married I dont have them, and that's ok. i've experienced anger and frustrations and sadness about it, but all in all realized that I'm just fine and I will be ok.

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